Summer Vamp

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Summer Vamp by Violet Chan Karim

It’s Maya’s last day of 7th grade at Baker Middle School. She’s sitting in the back of her dad’s car looking at her yearbook empty of signatures and well-wishes from friends. Her dad’s overly perky girlfriend, Charlotte, is there just to make the situation even better [sarcasm]. They have exciting news to share, but Maya needs to wait until dinner, ugggghhhh fine. 

Later, Charlotte invites Maya to watch Midnight with them and it’s a delightful riff on Twilight (and we squee). Maya is amused by the delight that is Midnight, saying vampires aren’t real so it’s dumb. Suddenly Maya stands up and runs off, denying that the movie is scary, which is what Charlotte and her dad think, saying it’s just boring. 

Maya runs off into the kitchen to watch videos instead. Kiki Cooks has posted a new one, garlic Parmesan pasta, and Maya wants to make it. Maya loves to cook and would much rather cook than have friends because they would likely think she’s weird. Maya follows the recipe (and we start to feel hungry) until she’s made a delicious pan of creamy pasta and a bit of a mess. Meanwhile, her dad and Charlotte have ordered pizza.

Rather than being happy his daughter made pasta for dinner all by herself, her dad tells her to put it in the fridge, the pizza is part of the surprise. What could a pizza delivered with all Maya's favorite toppings, spinach, feta, mushrooms and extra sausage, even mean? As tragic as fresh pasta in the fridge is, the pizza is delicious. Finally we get to the good news…Charlotte is going to move in. Surprise! They are excited and feel like it’s the next step in their relationship, but this news hits Maya hard and she runs up to her room, slamming the door behind her.

Maya feels like she acted like a bit of a baby, and as she is hiding in her blanket bubble, her dad comes into her room, letting her know that Charlotte has gone home. Her dad asks about her feelings toward Charlotte and her moving in, and they’re complicated but Maya only says “it's fine.” To cheer her up, Maya’s dad gives her a flyer for a culinary summer camp, Camp Umami, and she’s going! It’s a gift from Charlotte. 

Maya is packing for Camp Umami and makes sure to take all her essentials which include: a rolling pin, blender, kettle, chopping board, pan and her crêpe-making kit. She also makes room for a ‘Maya’s Summer Memories’ scrapbook from her dad. In no time Maya is being dropped off at the bus stop, but unfortunately can't remember which bus to take. Some other campers distract Maya and she gets so excited she follows them. The counselor checking in the campers asks if she is Mia (spelled M-I-A) and Maya corrects her pronunciation. Whatever. Maya gets on the bus…

Maya is bouncing with enthusiasm and wants to talk favorite dishes to cook, like frittatas, but her bench buddy, Nico, can’t cook except microwaving instant ramen which is when a red head with pointy teeth and pointy ears, Alex, and her bench buddy, Daisy, break it to Maya that this isn’t the bus to a regular summer camp, there will be no cooking. The counselors, Willow and Ben, then call attention and welcome everyone to Camp Dracula! Where the only thing that sucks is the mosquitoes!

WHAT!? Is this Charlotte punishing Maya for how she acted during Midnight and at dinner?! Or is Charlotte getting Maya out of the way so she can have her dad all to herself?! Maya is about to call her dad when her phone is confiscated. Nico puts up a good fight but loses to the might of the counselors and their rules. As the counselors talk through their rules, Maya’s stomach growls loudly, time for some yummy garlic Parmesan pasta leftovers! Which are promptly confiscated and tossed out the window: garlic is strictly forbidden! GASP!

Eventually they reach Camp Dracula and they’re separated into cabins. Maya is with Alex, Nico and Daisy in cabin Bumblebee. Other campers Maya has met, Oliver, Max, Will and Kevin, are in Flying Fox. Oliver is somewhat smitten by Maya, especially when he notices the are wearing the same shirt. Things are somewhat off at Camp Dracula, for example, the fish in the lake look like the shadow of an eldritch horror. Fun! As her other cabin mates head to bed, Maya unpacks her kitchen supplies and eventually goes to bed trying to figure out what is happening. Wait a second… the reaction to garlic… pointy ears… sharp fangs… THIS IS A CAMP FOR VAMPIRES!

Maya panics and runs out of the cabin to the counselors, saying she’s human and needs to call her dad. Willow and Ben are currently moving boxes of grade A Blood Boxes which sends her running back to the cabin. Maya needs to find a way to get out of there. The next morning, sitting in a circle with other campers, Maya is still blaming the whole situation on Charlotte, reasoning it was to get rid of her for good. Well played, Charlotte. Ben interrupts the conspiracy thoughts and asks Maya what she is most excited for. Freezing at the question, Alex blurts that Maya has a suitcase full of kitchen stuff, embarrassing Maya. Ben makes Alex apologize. 

Lunch is uninspiring and not wholly liquid based, there is a sad looking slice of pizza, an apple, some pudding, and a “juice” box of blood. Nasty. Ben interrupts Maya sitting alone and encourages her to be friends with her bunkmates, but she can’t stop looking at the splatter of blood on the side of his mouth. When he rubs at it and makes it worse, Maya nopes out of there, lunch untouched. 

Maya runs into Nico who is out thinking about the game updates they are missing out on while their phone is confiscated. New, local co-op dungeon with limited edition loot and double EXP event… curse you Camp Dracula!! Maya wants her phone back, too, so why don’t they work together to steal them back? Maya tells Nico her plan to sneak into the counselor's room when Willow comes across them. Nico instantly throws Maya under the bus, but Willow was only sending the two twerps back to the canteen. 

Super early the next morning, Nico wakes Maya up to enact her nefarious plan to steal their phones back, and because Nico is not subtle or quiet, they wake Alex and Daisy and spill the whole plan. Alex and Daisy want in too. On the way, Maya has a pretend dramatic moment in the sun after being questioned about sunscreen and is told that’s Hollywood propaganda and the sun is only a mild discomfort to vampires.

At the counselor's cabin, the group split up to look for their phones, Alex and Maya going together. They find the box of phones in the office, where Willow has fallen asleep watching Midnight. As they’re gathering the phones, Alex offers a sort-of apology that Maya accepts by rote. Maya accidentally drops a phone, which luckily doesn’t wake Willow up, but then they start bickering and Willow accidentally presses the IN CASE OF EMERGENCY big red button which does wake Willow up. And the rest of camp. And Maya throws Nico under the bus. 

Willow and Ben make Maya, Alex, Nico and Daisy write letters of apology to their guardians to explain what they did. Neat, Maya can finally contact her dad! But Willow and Ben will proofread for lies. Maya tries to disguise her message using the first letter of each line to spell H-E-L-P-M-E. The operation wasn’t a total loss though as Maya was still able to sneak away Nico’s phone.

Camp continues with vampire versions of typical camp activities so it’s basically just like gym class but you’re expected to transform into a bat. Maya hates gym class. Alex volunteers Maya as the blue team’s bat in Capture the Bat, but she can’t, you know BAT! and while Alex is trying to be friendly, she’s pretty bossy and Maya doesn’t want to stand out not being a bat, so they start to bicker again. Daisy comes running up really fast, picks Maya up and runs off. Maya tells her it’s her strategy not to BAT! and pushes Alex away as Daisy is about to be tagged. Yay for anything goes rules! The blue team kicks the red team's butts, in some cases, literally. 

After the game, Alex calls Maya out for cheating and not speaking up. Maya confesses her worries that she’s not brave and only causes problems. Alex says she’s just trying to be her friend but Daisy and Nico call hogwash on that. Realizing they have both made mistakes, Maya and Alex apologize and declare they’re cool. 

In the canteen later, Nico has their phone and is obsessively playing Oak Tales. They’re going to get caught! Alex, meanwhile, is complaining about the bland and total butt mashed potatoes. Have they heard of seasoning? Maya grabs some butter and potato chips, whips them together with cream cheese and chives and makes mashed potato bliss. Alex, Daisy and Nico totally get why Maya wanted to go to culinary camp. Unfortunately Maya’s magic doesn’t extend to the peas and carrots, and the camp lunch lady sees and hears her trashing them, forcing Maya to eat all the leftover veggies. 

Later, in their cabin, Nico does Maya’s nails and she tells them about Charlotte. Charlotte seems intense, but she’s actually a nice person and loves her dad and wants to be part of Maya’s life. Daisy points out that change is scary, but it doesn’t have to be bad. Just look at the potatoes! Just as Maya starts accepting Charlotte, she remembers she was the one who sent Maya to a camp full of blood suckers. 

The next day, Maya does a terrible job sneaking into the camp kitchen. She has come to apologize, not to trash the place, and give the lunch lady, Muriel, a peace offering: her crêpe making kit and offer to help make breakfast. Muriel agrees and looks up a crêpe recipe from the Kiki Cooks channel. Squee! Together they make crêpe heaven and Muriel extends an open offer to come back to cook anytime. The crêpes are a huge success… 

Until a mean girl, Jenny, mocks Maya and Alex stands up for her but checks that Maya doesn’t like the way Jenny makes her feel. Alex and Jenny start fighting and it really gets to Maya so she throws a strawberry and shouts that she just wants them to listen to her. Due to a lack of hand-eye coordination, Maya starts a food fight and crêpes fly everywhere until Willow calls the shenanigans to a stop. All fingers point to Jenny starting it.

Willow orders everyone to call their parents and tell them what they did. Maya talks to her dad and tells him about everything, making crêpes, starting a food fight, and her dad is happy and proud! He’s just glad Maya is having fun and making friends. She never tells him her camp mates are all vampires. Oh well. 

One night, everyone is sitting on blankets waiting for a meteor shower. Daisy is a space nerd and is spouting lots of space facts and Nico is braiding Maya’s hair, revealing her non-pointy ears which Alex catches a glimpse of. Then the meteor shower starts, distracting them, but Maya is distracted by Daisy calling them her best friends. Aww!! BUMBLEBEES FOR LIFE!

The weeks pass with water balloon fights, anime betrayals, origami, making pizza with Muriel, s’mores, singing, and hiking. Loads of memories Maya has filled her book with. The counselors have arranged bribery in exchange for child labor, or a scavenger hunt as everyone else calls it (thank you, Nico). Oliver tries to partner with Maya, but Alex beats him to it. As they’re foraging for mushrooms, Alex confronts Maya about her non-vampire ways. The not drinking blood, blunt regular looking teeth and non-pointy ears. Maya tries to keep on with the scavenger hunt, but Alex is relentless, and drags Maya to the lake and to reveal her very obvious reflection. She’s human!

Alex is hurt. She opened up to Maya only to find out that Maya is a liar. When Maya reaches for Alex, Alex brushes her away but accidentally knocks Maya into the lake with the eldritch horror shadow. Oliver jumps in to save her, and quickly needs saving himself. Thankfully Willow and Ben see what happened and Ben pulls them both out. Alex is in big trouble with Willow. Later at the cabin, Maya defends Alex to Daisy and Nico saying she’s their friend and it was an accident. Willow escorts Alex back to the cabin only to collect her things; she's being moved to a different cabin even though Maya says it was an accident. 

Maya grabs Daisy and Nico, drags them inside with Alex, locks the door, closes the curtains and confesses the deep dark secret that she’s been harboring all summer… she is a human! Oh. Is that all? Yeah, Daisy and Nico thought it was a secret everyone knew. That was… underwhelming. They don’t care if Maya is human or vampire, it doesn’t change how they feel about her. Nico asks how Maya ended up at Camp Dracula and Maya shows them the Camp Umami brochure. The picture on the front looks familiar to Daisy… it’s the other side of the lake! Oh! That means Charlotte wasn’t trying to have her eaten by vampires to make sure she had Maya’s father to herself, Maya just got on the wrong bus.  

Nico offers their phone to call them and pick Maya up, but their phone is dead and there are no outlets. Life has lost all meaning to Nico now. As an alternative plan, Alex suggests stealing the boats that night and rowing over. Maya is up for it but doesn’t want her friends getting in trouble. They’re in this together!

Under the cover of darkness, Maya, Alex, Daisy and a weeping heartbroken Nico head to the lake. Nico is heartbroken, not at the dead phone, surprisingly, but at Maya leaving because they will not see her at Camp Dracula next year, and they will never have her delicious crêpes again. They are interrupted by Ben who hears them, so Daisy offers to run interference. It only works until Willow turns up and sees Maya and Alex in the boat and Nico about to get in. Nico kicks the boat away from the dock. 

Alex rows the boat across the lake, but they didn’t account for the tenacity of Willow who is coming up fast in another row boat. Alex rows faster but they need to lose weight. Maya starts throwing her rolling pin, pans and other assorted kitchen items at Willow to lighten the boat but her hand-eye coordination is still terrible and Willow is near invincibility with her powers of teenage angst. Maya only has her crêpe making kit left when she tries one last Hail Mary. Maya tries to reason with Willow and when she disarms her with emotional vulnerability, Maya strikes the killing blow with her crêpe making kit. 

Maya and Alex reach the shore of Camp Umami. They hug and Maya heads inside the camp. As she walks, Maya thinks about Muriel and making Kiki Cooks recipes with her, about Nico being funny, about how nice Daisy is and cool Alex is, and wonders why she is trying to get to Camp Umami. Everything she wants is in Camp Dracula. Before Alex gets too far, Maya comes running back up.

Meanwhile, at Camp Dracula, Nico and Daisy aren’t saying a thing about where Maya and Alex have gone. Ben begs Willow for her special brand of scary help, but she no longer cares. Suddenly Maya and Alex come running over, Ben is confused but delighted by the sweet reunion, Willow orders them on dishwashing duty the rest of camp. 

On the last day of camp, before leaving, Maya gives Muriel her crêpe pan as a parting gift. She would have given her more, but everything else is at the bottom of the lake. At the bus stop in town, Maya and Mia see each other, it seems they both went to the right camp after all. Nico is crying with happiness when their parents arrive, they can charge their phone last, or so they think. The camp counselors told their parents about their mischief and now they are on a one month phone ban. NOOOOOOOOOO!! 

Daisy’s parents are next, then Alex’s brother. Everyone promises to write until next summer. Soon Maya’s dad and Charlotte arrive. Maya and her dad hug, and then Maya hugs Charlotte which nearly breaks Charlotte with happiness. On the ride home, Maya pulls out her memory book. On the last page is a photo of her with Daisy, Alex and Nico and everyone, including Oliver, Jenny, Muriel, Ben and Willow, has signed it.